How to torture cats

For months, we dreaded moving the kitties from Michigan to Utah. Using Dirk’s dog gate, we set up an area in the back of the Subaru Outback complete with a litter box, food and blankets. We had two main concerns: the heat (not much air conditioning gets back there) and Shakespeare attacking the other cats. The only way to explain Shakespeare is that he’s the crazy old guy living out of a shopping cart near QD – he’s unpredictable and scary, but you tend to learn to ignore his eccentricities over time.

I had the distinct pleasure of following Dirk for the beginning of the ride. This allowed me to watch the cats try to climb up the gate, hop from window to window and generally freak out. For the first two hours, they stayed back there with less whining than we predicted. We started to get concerned because the sun was beating down on them; soon Breck and Kirkwood were visibly panting. Shakespeare found a perch and seemed fairly calm, but Dirk said he was crying quite a bit.

About three hours into the ride, I witnessed Shakespeare escape between the car wall and the gate through some miracle of kitty contortionism. We pulled over and put him into the crate in the passenger seat, which made him surprisingly happy because he could at least look at Dirk to calm himself.

A few hours later, Breck and Kirkwood looked miserable. We decided to let them all wander around the car instead of keeping them in the back. Amazingly, they each found their own spot to curl up and did great for the rest of the trip. They went into the back to use the litter box and eat, but slept otherwise. It was so much better than we feared.

When we got to the hotel, we had to wrangle them into cat carriers to take them into the hotel. They all immediately hid under the bed in the hotel room, but came out for food without much persuasion. By evening, Breck was bounding around the room at spastic speed. In the grand tradition of Breck, he’s always just happy to be here. Even Shakespeare and Kirkwood curled up on the bed for the night. 

The next day went well with the kitties. Shakespeare insisted on sitting on Dirk’s lap for the entire ride, but apparently purred and slept when allowed to sit there. The other kitties were happy to sprawl out on boxes. 

The adjusted right away to the new place and all is (amazingly) back to normal - at least with the kitties.

The Great Perhaps playlist

1,000 songs on my iPod and I made my way through most of them on the trip. Here is the definitive playlist for those moving west.

Cat Stevens “Father and Son”

Indigo Girls “Closer to Fine”

John Denver “I Guess He’s Rather be in Colorado”

Clay Aiken “Moon River”

Rise Against “Audience of One”

Tracy Chapman “Fast Car”

Frank Sinatra "My Way"

Dixie Chicks "Wide Open Spaces"

Michael Buble "Feelin' Good"
Miley Cyrus "It's the Climb"
Janis Joplin "Me and Bobby McGee"

Conner Oberst "Moab"

Last chance for gear

One week until the move and there are still a few big things on the to do list. Other than packing, a top priority was heading to the MSU bookstore to stock up on Spartan merchandise. We won’t be coming back this football season, and ordering online really eliminates the fun of impulse buying.

I ended up buying a sweatshirt, three t-shirts and a hat. We were really tempted to buy a few more MSU pint glasses, but the thought of packing them made us reconsider.

Only one day could make this day complete: A press conference where Izzo announces he’s staying at MSU. What are the chances? 

Garden Envy

Since the season is pretty much over, I’ve decided to use the blog to document some of our adventures moving West.

There are many differences between Michigan and Utah that I’ve noticed going back and forth in preparation for the move. One of the biggest is Utah’s apparent State hobby of gardening. In Michigan it’s normal to throw up a few tomato plants, and maybe even add some beans and carrots. Usually, Michiganders do this on Memorial Day and are able to get it all done then. I’ve always questioned just how much people in Michigan actually eat out of their gardens given the rampant obesity – but that’s a whole other entry.

Here in Utah, gardening is different. Almost every house has its own mini-farm in the backyard. I’m talking plowed plots of land and box gardens with all different types of plants. Even the most well-landscaped McMansion contains a huge garden somewhere in the back. Each Saturday is some kind of unofficial, community workday, and everyone is out gardening all day long. (Mormons don’t seem to work on Sundays from what I’ve seen, so they have a lot to accomplish on that one day a week).

To give a taste of what I’m talking about, here’s a picture of the garden from our neighbors behind us. Notice the well; there’s also a watering system. If society as we know it comes to an end, these people will survive.

Our yard is a bit wild because the owners didn’t finish their landscaping and we’re not about to pony up the money to mulch huge, empty flowerbeds. I figured it would be much easier to grow a few essential (tomatoes, peppers, herbs) in pots rather than weed all the beds to avoid having the weeds spread back into my garden patch. This weekend, I put together my lame container garden (see below).

Interesting, my garden did give me some kind of credibility with the neighbors. After not meeting them at all, several different families introduced themselves and noted that I was growing a garden. Of course, mine is completely lame compared to all the other ones, but just the fact that I was growing some food seemed to give me a little credibility.

5/31/10

Conditions: Springtastic – 50-60 degrees and sunny

Location: Snowbird, Utah

It’s been hard to keep track of our days with Dirk hitting epic Spring powder while I pack up the condo in Michigan. The blog has suffered. Let’s just say that Dirk has more days than I do at this point. (Yes, I realize I sat at home with him during the months after his surgery. It doesn’t make sense to me either.)

Today was the second day we rode together over a great Memorial Day weekend. Snowbird is one of only a few resorts in the lower 48 still open. Even though it’s the last day in May, the snowpack is amazing. More rocks are covered now than were covered over Christmas.

Mineral was soft as early as 8:00am, so we spent most of our morning there. Unlike Saturday, we didn’t have to stick to the groomers today. Everything was soft and cushy. Most of all, it was warm and sunny.

After a short break to shed some layers and share a Gatorade, we headed to Provo. Little Cloud was still a bit form, so we headed back to Mineral where everything was soft and creamy. We took a ton of laps, and the snow was mashed potatoes and gravy later in the day. With our legs fully spent, we headed sown one more run on the front side before heading in.

Highlight:

I have two rules for Spring riding. Rule one: Don’t drink and ride – it’s not worth it. Rule two: If you wear anything but a jacket, it must represent your college football team. Today, I got a nice “Go Green” from a random guy on the chairlift. Turns out, he grew up just a few miles away from me in Birmingham. There are only two times I like to meet new people: on mountains or at MSU sporting events; this was the best of both.

Lowlight:

We were skiing on Memorial Day. There is no lowlight.

Après Ski:

After a quick stop at Whole Foods for dinner fare, we headed home…to our own house…to relax and make dinner. The only things missing were the kitties.

Days to go: As many as we can get

4/9/10

Day 20

Conditions: Hard

Location: Snowbird, UT

Our last day riding for a while was upon us as we headed to Snowbird this morning. In a cruel twist of fate, Snowbird opened the canyon road for the first time in days yesterday – the very day we scheduled both Direct TV and a washer/dryer to be delivered. We did have two great powder days at Snowbasin, so we weren’t too bummed about missing out on the Canyon crawl.

Things had a changed a bit today. Everything was skied out from the mob that showed up yesterday. Also, the temperatures had really dropped overnight. All that was left was an icy, hard-pack, even on the groomers. We rode as long as we could, but it only added up to a few hours.

With no signs of softening, we decided to call it and head back to the house to get some errands done. I guess that’s the beauty of living here: if it’s a bad day, you just go home, crack a beer and do some errands.  I can handle that.

Days to go: 30 (Yes, I know we’re not going to make 50…)

4/7/10

Day 19

Conditions: Powder

Location: Snowbasin, Utah

When we work up this morning the road into Snowbird was still closed after snowing all night long. We had a great day at Snowbasin, and knew that there would be plenty of fresh snow there today – especially in the areas that were unrideable yesterday.

Another quick drive and we were there. We spent all morning riding the Strawberry Gondola, the area that had horrible winds the day before. We were amazed at just how huge the area was. We literally spent all morning getting to know every chute, cliff, natural pipe and hike. There was so much to do on just one chair, and we had the whole place to our selves. (Most of the locals has taken the past few days off work to ski, so it was inevitable that they would have to do back to work).

We rode and hiked nonstop until about 1pm. By the time we broke for lunch and sat down, we realized that we were exhausted and decided to pack it in for the day.

Highlights:

Seeing just how great Snowbasin is. We had tons of conversations on the chairlift with season pass holders, and it truly solidified our decision to buy a Snowbasin pass and just do a few days at the bird next year.

Lowlights:

We were a bit tired and did quit early. That’s always a bit of a morale killer. But as locals we’re allowed to quit early, right?

Après Ski:

We prepared the condo for the big day tomorrow: Directv, washer and dryer all being delivered and installed.

Days to go: 31

4/6/10

Day 18

Conditions: Powder

Location: Snowbasin, Utah

The road into Little Cottonwood Canyon was closed today after 7 feet of snow fell in 7 days. But we weren’t too disappointed because we got to check out our new home mountain: Snowbasin, Utah.

The Basin reported 24 inches of snow, so we weren’t too disappointed that we couldn’t make it to the bird. It’s a huge mountain with 3,000 acres of terrain and 500 inches of annual snowfall. But even more impressive than the mountain is the lodge and the food. Vail and Deer Valley have nothing on the lodge at Snowbasin. The bathrooms were so nice they were almost picture-worthy.

We struck up a conversation with a ski instructor, Paul, who talked to us for about a half an hour about the mountain, where to go and why it’s just as good as The Bird. He definitely made believers out of us before we even boarded the gondola.

We got to know the John Paul chair and had some fantastic powder turns all morning. We both finally mastered the exact angles and stance widths to use for powder so that (for once) everything was seamless.

The visibility deteriorated later in the day, so we called it a bit early. And, in case you’re wondering, the Bird never opened.

Highlights:

Discovering the Snowbasin is literally 20 minutes from where we live! We started imagining how awesome it will be to live this close to such a great place to ride and it was almost overwhelming. No more 3+ hour drives to lame ass Boyne Mountain.

Lowlights:

Getting scared off of Strawberry Gondola. We had decent visibility for most of the day, but the Strawberry area was insanely windy. We could not see anything and ended up on a sketchy traverse. We really needed to get to know the mountain better before taking on that area in blinding conditions.

Après Ski:

Errands, errands, errands. There is a lot to do when you move!

Days to go: 32

4/5/10

Day 17

Conditions: Powder

Location: Snowbird, Utah

Our first day back in much too long, and we drove to The Bird to find plenty of fresh powder. It had been dumping for days and days, but there was still plenty of fresh to be had. Dirk also fulfilled a life-long dream of buying a Snowbird season pass. Sure, it was just a Spring Pass...but he had a moment. 

Mineral and Road to Provo were closed, so we spent some time on the front side lapping our usual tree runs.

At noon, patrol announced there were major lightning storms and that all lifts were shut down. The lifts had to remain closed for 10 minutes after each occurrence of lightening or thunder, and every time there was lightning or thunder, the clock reset. Let’s just say that there was a lot of thunder.

We took a leap of faith and left. We had many errands to run for the upcoming weeks. As it turns out, Snowbird never reopened at all.

Highlight:

That “it’s good to be back” feeling! Despite minor aches and pains, we managed to have some great runs. Just the feel of the boards on our feet was therapeutic.

Lowlights:

Leaving at noon. That sucked.

Après Ski:

We headed home and complete a ton of errands. Then I cooked dinner in our brand new house. Gas stoves rock!

Days to go: 33

4/4/2010

The beginning of April, and we’ve racked up a meager sixteen days of boarding. Bad snow, injuries and the job search all seem muddled together into a winter that has been at the same time worthless and productive.

We started driving Dirk’s things out to Utah last night. In addition to my normal neuroticism, I have a special neuroticism for towing things behind vehicles. It’s always made me nervous, back to the days of hauling my grandfather’s bass boat behind a minivan for summer vacations.

With the U-Haul packed to the brim we racked up fourteen fun-filled hours on Friday. We spent the night in Kearney, Nebraska and woke up bright and early to complete the trip. Three hours into Saturday’s drive, we stopped for gas. As we pulled in, I heard a peculiar whining sound - but Dirk was convinced it was coming from a dog in the car next to us. As we pulled away, the whining sound was back. We debated whether to take a look, and Dirk finally instructed me to drive slowly while he stood outside the car and took a look at the wheel. As soon as he got out, he summoned me.

I don’t know anything about cars, but even I could tell that wheel was F-U-C-T. The Truck Stop mechanic came over to help Dirk’s diagnosis.

“Don’t you drive that thing there one more inch! Bearings bust; spindles bust; that wheel should have fallen off miles ago,” he grunted in Nebraska-ease. “I can’t fix it for you, so you best just get a room for the night here and try to work it out with U-Haul tomorrow. The closest dealer is in Ogallala.”

It was Easter Sunday and we had an undriveable U-Haul. But I have this thing about creepy Nebraska towns and any motel chain that is located in the same parking lot as a Truck Stop. I guess watching The Hills Have Eyes combined with the 20/20 Hotel Horrors expose finally caught up to me.

We called U-Haul and started progressing through the various menus – computerized and human. Over an hour later, the mechanic from Ogallala showed up. Great news – he can fix it! Well, kind of. He has to drive back to his shop (20 country miles away) and get the stuff to try and fix it. But before he leaves, he commented that he sees this “all the time” with U-Haul trailers because the mechanics never oil them up for cross-country distances. (Hmm…that makes us feel great about the other wheel on this trailer.

He leaves. An hour later, he returns. He works on the wheel for a half hour and then reports that he can’t fix it. We’ll have to get another trailer; luckily he’s made the wheel temporarily road-worthy so we can drive it there.

We drive the trailer to his shop in the middle of creep-town and have the distinct pleasure of unloading the entire trailer and trying to Tetris Dirk's stuff back in. Now, this is no ordinarily-packed trailer. Dirk has personally fastened his own hanging-clothes bar by drilling it into the side of the U-Haul and the box spring. So, this transfer is a huge process and takes at least an hour. (And, yes, the whole time we were packing the new trailer, we were wondering if this new one had been prepared for cross-country distances).

Five hours after initially stopping for gas, we were ready to get back on the road. We had over ten hours of driving still to do. We did make it safe to home sweet home at around 1am Utah time. But every mile was filled with worry and terror as we waited for the new trailer to break.

It could have been worse...the wheel of the first trailer could have fallen off and all our stuff could have been ruined. But, really, that's just another reason U-Haul is on my shit list. So, did we get any money back? Well, the trailer was $500 and we got $35 refunded for our trouble.....